25 Awesome Ways To Improve Your Sex Life!
1.Take it Slow: Believe it or not, fanning the flame doesn’t require adding unexplored territory to your sexual resume. Rather than focusing on things you haven’t tried before, consider honing the things that are tried and true. Sure, the end game of most sexual experiences is orgasm, but it’s what you do to get there that makes all the difference in terms of whether there is a relationship beneath the physical chemistry.
This is an especially difficult concept to grasp for couples who have been together for years, or busy couples who juggle work, home life, personal relationships, kids, and recreation. Rushing to the finish line and reaching that climactic experience might seem like the best way to enjoy sex with your partner, but it could have a negative or passive effect.
To enhance your sexual relationship, we suggest taking things slow, exploring each others’ bodies the way you may have when you first met. Use your time to get to know what your partner enjoys and dislikes and focus on the feel-good touching he or she responds to most. The key to great sex is what you do to make it great, and knowing what your partner likes is the best place to begin.
2. Be Honest: Whether they want to admit it or not, most individuals engage in fantasy, enjoy visually sexual material, and participate in solo sexual gratification. Rather than hiding these habits from your partner, invite him or her to experience them with you. When you shar your sexual life with your partner, you open the door to a more honest and in-tune sexual experience.
If you feel shy about sharing your fantasies, ask your partner to write his or her down while you do the same. Take turns reading them and getting to know what makes your partner excited. Not all fantasies have to be re-enacted; sometimes it’s nice just to talk about the things that turn you on, and then experience physical intimacy together.
3. Use Lubrication: This might seem like a simple concept, but many women who don’t enjoy sexual intercourse are missing out because they are experiencing discomfort or pain. Not all types of sexual pain can be solved with lubricant, but following the natural lubrication which occurs when aroused, with a little personal lubricant will guarantee that everything goes smoothly, and no pain is felt due to dryness.
Using lubricant can also evolve a sexual experience into something new. Many lubricants double as massage oils. Some lubricants are flavored and allow for more oral based activities. Always read the directions on your lubricants before use, as some are not meant for vagina intercourse. Never mix latex based lubricant with latex toys, as the latex in the lubricant will cause the material in the toy to break down.
4. Make Every Goodbye Kiss Count: Kissing is a very underrated form of sexual intimacy, one which many assume is too vanilla to spice things up. On the contrary, studies have shown that kissing your partner regularly can increase feelings of physical attraction. It also deepens your chemistry, especially for couples who have been together a while and have fallen to the standard of a peck on the way out the door or before bed.
Not every kiss has to be the stuff of Hollywood movies, but if your goodbye kisses are hot and steamy, it’s more likely to increase your longing to see your partner again later. This can create feelings of anticipation for the next time you see each other, which will add to sexual encounters later in the day.
5. Make Your Sexual Space Enjoyable: Finally, if you’re looking for a way to increase your satisfaction this Valentine’s Day, you can do so by making your sexual space a place that you enjoy spending time in. If this is the bedroom, you can increase the sexual ambience with scented candles, silky sensual sheets, and the addition of toys and personal lubricant for use during sexual stimulation.
If you enjoy your sexual space, chances are, your partner will too, and setting can be an important aspect of stimulation. If you and your partner live together, you can model this area together. Choosing items together can make experiencing them later more enjoyable.
Looking for more ways to spice things up? Why not focus on things you can do together that highlight the qualities which attracted you to each other in the first place? For example, if your partner’s active lifestyle is what made you look twice, take a fitness class and get sweaty together. Getting healthy, and toning your body improves blood flow and endurance, both of which can be a benefit in the bedroom. Doing something together also gives you something to talk about and bond over other than the day to day work and home life you experience regularly.
6. Do Kegal Exercises- Kegal Exercises for both men an women have tremendous benefits. It is an exercising that requires you squeeze your buttocks several times. For men this exercise helps with internally massaging the prostate gland as well as controlling ejaculation and for women with bulding up the pelvic floor muscles as well as the vaginal wall muscles.
7. Don’t Treat Sex Like an Obligation or Chore- Try to set up specific days and times to have sex, especially when you and your partner may have busy work schedules, children that you are raising and your time is limited.
8. Listen to The Experts- There are a multitude of sex experts that can be sourced out on the internet and who have written books, videos and have their own websites who can address issues such as communicating with your partner, sexual expectations, sexual anxiety issues with intimacy and the like can all be addressed with couples therapy.
9. Foreplay is the Prelude to The Grand Finale- Studies have shown that it takes a bit longer for women to become aroused then men . Getting to the point of full arousal will enhance and even aid in a full orgasm due to the fact that the genitalia is fully engorged with blood and aroused.
10. Get Yearly Medical Exams With Lab Work- It is always wise for you to get a yearly medical exam with your family practitioner along with lab work. Most health insurance companies will cover these services without any out of pocket expense and bill it as a yearly preventative check up. For a male the blood work would measure results for liver, kidney, pancreas, electrolytes, glucose, cholesterol, thyroid function, complete blood count (CBC w/diff) as well as a Prostate Specific Antigen (PSA) blood test and a Testosterone Level and for a female it will be the same blood test including an estrogen blood test minus the Testosterone and PSA. Females should also, have a yearly mammogram to test for any breast cancer as well as a pap smear with their gynecologist.
11. Get to The Gym- When starting off with an exercise regimen it is best to start off with a lite to medium cardio, yoga, and/or weight training will keep your weight down and help increase your libido as well as boost self esteem.
12. Monitor Your Medication- Certain medications will decrease libido such as antidepressants, birth control, allergy medications as well as certain blood pressure and diabetes medications that can cause erectile dysfunction in men. For men who do not take blood thinners or nitroglycerin based medications for their heart they can always get a prescription online from an online doctor.
13. Proper Nutrition- Fatty and deep fried foods as well as sugar (fruit juices, soda, alcohol), carbohydrates (bread, pasta, cake, cookies) tend to turn to fat and put on weight which wreak havoc on your libido and self esteem not to say what they do to your pancreas, blood vessels and heart. It is best to eat more vegetables, fruit’s, grains, nuts as well as more “clean” protein sources found in fish (especially Salmon which contains Omega 3’s) and lean quality red meat every once in a while.
14. Heart Health is Important- With proper nutrition and exercise as mentioned in the last 2 points it is always a good idea to get your blood pressure checked and monitored during the course of the year. High blood pressure is not called the “Silent Killer” for nothing. If left unchecked it can lead to a stroke, heart attack, kidney failure and even death. If you are already on a blood pressure medication it is best to buy a home blood pressure monitor and keep track of your blood pressure and if you need a refill for your blood pressure medication and you cannot get in to see a doctor you can always get an online prescription from a doctor online
15. 2 Way Communication is Required- Two way communication with your partner is essential and necessary, especially when you are transparent and honest, it opens up a space to build trust, respect, love and trust and allows the dialogue when communicating to flow freely, but more importantly it is always better to be a good listener and hear out your partner without interrupting, verbally attacking or always being on the defense. Most disagreements between couples usually start over minor things because of poor communication. It’s what leads to losing the love and respect for one another.
16. Minimize Work and Stress at Home and in The Bedroom- We live in a very busy society with a lot of “hustle and bustle” in which we tend to get caught up with work, finances, children, pets, hobbies and the like which leads to neglecting our partner and putting them in a position of feeling unloved, isolated and alienated and even angry and frustrated which leads to arguing. Giving each other positive reinforcement and attention as if it were the first time you ever met is the key ingredient in a successful sex life.
17. Keep Things “Fresh” and “New”- You can live happily ever after if you continue to do the things that you did the first time you ever met by incorporating the date nights, hiking, dinner and a movie or whatever “sparked the flame” the first time you met.
18. Avoid Illicit Street Drugs- At all cost avoid illicit street drugs (i.e. Cocaine, Methamphetamine, Ecstacy) for several reason 1.) They are addictive and 2.) they will take a toll on your mental (cognitive, mood, psychosis and altered state) and physical health (brain, heart, cardiovascular system)
19. Control Alcohol Intake- While a moderate amount of alcohol (i.e. wine at dinner or a beer is OK) excessive drinking can impair your ability to perform and may even cause erectile dysfunction in men and reduced lubrication or vaginal dryness in women.
20. Don’t Smoke or Try to Quit- Smoking takes toll on your lungs as well as your cardiovascular system which is detrimental for sexual organs to perform optimally. Not to say that the lingering smell of cigarettes on your cloths and breath which is not very appealing or sexy.
21. Avoid Self Criticism- In other words be easy on yourself and be patient and understanding about change. For example if you feel as though you are overweight and your self esteem is down, making some slow short term goals and changes for eating better and exercising a little over time with consistency and patience (key point) you will make the changes and start feeling about yourself and the results will last forever. As humans we have a natural tendency to make resolutions and then talk ourselves out of them with the “All or None” principle, and this never works. The reason why this never works is that we set unrealistic goals for ourselves and we get impatient.
22. It’s OK to Initiate Sex- Let your partner know through verbal and/or nonverbal communication that you are ready for sex, this can be initiated with music, candle light dinner, bath, massage or anything sensual.
23. Discuss and be Transparent About Bodily Changes or Issues- It’s OK to be honest and transparent with your partner about current or past sexual changes with your body. As women age they experience vaginal dryness and men erectile dysfunction. These things happen and when they do it is better to discuss so that you or your partner do not think it is them that is causing these changes.
24. Be Spontaneous and Playful- It is always good to be sexually spontaneous. This could mean having sex in different rooms of the house, different sexual positions and even different times of the day like the morning. Change it up and don’t get in a rut.
25. Be Open To Change- it is one thing to be spontaneous, but be open for change and spontaneity in your sex life with your one and only partner, stay monogamous otherwise the previous suggestions for a better sex life will not work, its about quality in a relationship not quantity despite what you hear and see on television and in the movies.
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